Saturday, 6 February 2016

A Brief Catch-up and a Little Pondering


So,
Another year.
The last time I posted something here was when I went to India.

And did anything interesting happen in between such gap?
...Well, not really.
I am sorry, but my life is pretty ordinary.
Overall.


But hey, I graduated uni.
FUCKING FINALLY.

And I have some mental notes regarding that single event.
And it's about human relationship. or mainly, friendship. because you know, sometimes you never can really find who is actually your 'friend'.

So here it is.

I mainly categorized my 'friends' into three kingdoms.
(I could just say 'groups' or 'types' but 'kingdoms' sounds WAY mightier.)

  1. Friends who become your role models. they inspire you, or you aspire to them.
  2. Friends who fight the same battle as you. your buddies, classmates, something like that.
  3. Friends who remind you NOT to become like them. these are usually the ones with bad reputation, or the ones who always make bad decisions throughout their life. 

However, I became fully aware that friends in the SECOND KINGDOM, do fluctuate in quality. Sometimes they whom you think are the closest and trust the most betray you. Or at the very least, do something you would never think they are capable of (in a bad way, of course). And some other times, those who you never think about go through a considerable amount of distance just for you. And they leave you at a loss for words.

This phenomenon happened to me in this graduation day.

Well, I have always kept myself a considerably small number of 'good friends', just because I pretty suck at friendship. So when I graduated actually I did not expect any gifts. I thought I would simply be happy when my friends show up after the ceremony and tell me jokingly, "Hey, now you are an unemployed girl! Jobless people!"

And yet I got all of these things:


No mean to brag... but I think for a professional introvert, I did pretty good huh?


AND YET (again), those people who I think would come never did.
They did not even drop me a message.
Even more a call.

It was as if it never happened.
As if they did not acknowledge my graduation.
And we were supposed to be buddies... or something close enough to it.


And it would be a flat-out lie if I said it did not hurt me. But in a strangest way, I understand. Sometimes even those people so-called your 'friends' do not really care about what you did. About what you accomplished. and some other times, they just do not want to care. I have this feeling that I know their reasons, but I won't put it here.

It's just my own assumption, after all.

So for you lots who cared enough for me to wait until the rain stopped today, I am really, REALLY thankful. For all the flowers and gifts and hugs and laughs and words you've given me this afternoon... I would remember it.

You know who you are.

And please spread the same kind of kindness to your other friends. You might think they won't notice your absence, but they will. And when you show up to them only for a simple "Congratulations!", it would warm their hearts. It would give them extra power for the next step.



Officially joining the job-hunting troops,
z. d. imama

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